Luxury Redefined: Escape to Excel Oriental Hotel, Lagos
Luxury Redefined: Escape to Excel Oriental Hotel, Lagos - A Review (With a Little Bit of Chaos)
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because this isn't your average hotel review. We're diving headfirst into the Excel Oriental Hotel in Lagos, Nigeria, and let me tell you, it was a journey. Not always smooth, not always perfect, but definitely a memorable one. And hey, isn't that what travel is all about? Let's get this show on the road, shall we?
First Impressions & Accessibility:
Finding the Excel Oriental felt like a real quest! Lagos traffic, people! But once I got there, the exterior promised… well, something. The entrance seemed promisingly grand. Now, about accessibility… This is where things got a little… mixed. The hotel, thankfully, does have an elevator, a HUGE plus! And they claim to have "facilities for disabled guests." I didn't personally test the full accessibility of rooms, but the presence of the elevator and the staff's willingness to assist gave me a good feeling. (Accessibility – good start, but needs more specifics on room accessibility)
Inside, the air conditioning was a godsend. Lagos heat is no joke.
Cleanliness & Safety: The Sanitization Tango
Alright, let's talk COVID era. Excel Oriental is trying. They've got all the buzzwords – "anti-viral cleaning products," "daily disinfection," "hand sanitizer everywhere." I caught myself using the hand sanitizer a lot, and hey, better safe than sorry, right? They even mention "individually-wrapped food options" – which, honestly, just made me feel a little sad about the buffet. (Cleanliness & Safety - generally good, but perfection is impossible)
Here's a confession: I did see a staff member absentmindedly touch their face once while wiping down a table. Now, did it bother me? A little. But… it's human, innit? We’re all just trying to survive, and maybe my standards are too high.
Rooms: My Personal Sanctuary (Mostly)
The room itself? Decent. The bed? Glorious. Seriously, I sank into it like a warm hug. (Available in all rooms: Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.) Everything you’d expect. I had a view (not a spectacular one, but hey, it's Lagos!). The air conditioning was bliss. The Wi-Fi worked… most of the time. (More on that later). The blackout curtains were a lifesaver for beating the Lagos sun. The “complimentary tea” was instant, sure, but hey, sometimes you just need a cuppa.
Internet: The Wi-Fi Woes
Okay, so let’s talk Wi-Fi. Declared “Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!” I’m a digital nomad wannabe, so this is KEY for me. And… ugh. It was a bit patchy. Sometimes lightning fast, other times… crickets. ( Internet, Internet [LAN], Internet services, Wi-Fi in public areas, Wi-Fi [free] ) The LAN option was available too, a nice addition, for those old-schoolers who prefer a wired connection. Overall? Room for improvement. I managed, eventually.
Dining, Drinking & Snacking: A Mixed Bag of Delights
Now, the FOOD! This is where things got interesting.
- Breakfast: The breakfast buffet (Breakfast [buffet], Asian breakfast, Western breakfast), was… plentiful. A decent spread of the usual suspects. I piled my plate high with pastries, eggs, and whatever else looked vaguely appealing (and safe). The coffee, bless its heart, just wasn’t great.
- Restaurants, Bars, Lounges: The hotel offers a variety of options. Restaurants, a bar, a poolside bar (A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western cuisine in restaurant). I had a proper meal at the restaurant, and it was pretty great! I'd happily go again. The cocktails were… potent. (Poolside bar).
- The Snack Bar: I wandered in here craving something… anything. I settled for a plate of something with questionable authenticity, but hey, it hit the spot at that moment.
Things To Do & Ways to Relax: Spa Day Dreams
Here's where the Excel Oriental really shines, or at least has the potential to.
- Spa: The spa! Oh, the spa! (Body scrub, Body wrap, Foot bath, Massage, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, ) I’m a sucker for a good massage, and I was dying for some pampering after navigating Lagos traffic. And it was AMAZING. The masseuse was fantastic, and I almost fell asleep on the table. I’m not usually one for the whole "body scrub" thing, it left my skin glowing. And then there was the sauna… pure heaven.
- Pool & Gym: The pool (Pool with view, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]) looked inviting, but I never actually took a dip. The gym (Fitness center, Gym/fitness) looked well-equipped, if you’re that kind of person (I am not).
Services and Conveniences: The Little Things That Matter
- Convenience: The hotel offered a solid list of services. (Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center). I found the concierge particularly helpful, especially when dealing with the chaotic streets of Lagos. The elevator was a godsend. And the daily housekeeping was impeccable.
- Cashless Payment: Cashless payment service was available, which is always a plus nowadays.
For the Kids & Special Occasions:
- For the kids (Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal): I didn’t see many children, but the hotel seemed geared towards families.
- Special Events: The hotel has facilities for (weddings, conferences, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Indoor venue for special events, Outdoor venue for special events, Wi-Fi for special events).
Getting Around & Other Bits & Bobs:
- Getting Around: Airport transfer, Bicycle parking, Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Taxi service, Valet parking – All good. I took a taxi, but the airport transfer seems convenient.
- Security: CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property, Check-in/out [express], Check-in/out [private], Couple's room, Exterior corridor, Fire extinguisher, Front desk [24-hour], Hotel chain, Non-smoking rooms, Proposal spot, Room decorations, Safety/security feature, Security [24-hour], Smoke alarms, Soundproof rooms - they appeared to be reasonably secure. Lagos is a wild city, after all.
Overall: The Verdict (The Honest Truth)
The Excel Oriental Hotel isn’t perfect. But it’s trying. It’s clean (ish), safe (ish), and comfortable enough. The service is generally friendly, and the spa is worth its weight in gold. Is it a luxury experience? In some ways, yes. In others, it still has some room for growth. Honestly? I’d go back. The bed alone is worth it.
My Rating: 3.8 out of 5 stars.
The Chaotic Call to Action: Your Escape to Excel Oriental Awaits!
Feeling stressed? Overwhelmed? Need a break from the Lagos hustle? Do you want a getaway?
Then Book your stay at the Excel Oriental Hotel today!
Here's what you
Steal Away to Paradise: Luxurious Zeeland Studio Awaits!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups! This isn't your perfectly polished, sterile Excel itinerary. This is… me trying to survive, enjoy, and maybe – just maybe – conquer the Oriental Hotel in Lagos. Prepare for chaos, questionable decisions, and possibly a deep-seated love for jollof rice.
Here's my (highly likely to be derailed) plan:
(Excel Sheet Heading - Because, well, Excel)
Oriental Hotel: Lagos - The Maybe-Survived Itinerary - AKA: Pray For Me
| Date | Time | Activity/Destination | Transportation | Notes - AKA: My Mental Breakdown | Mood (Emoji Forecast) | Expenses (Naira) | Rating (out of 5 - because I need validation) | |---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---| | Day 1: Arrival & Existential Dread | | | | | | | | | 2/11/2024 | 06:00 AM | Wake up (or, as my brain puts it, attempt wake up). | My groggy self, reluctantly dragging itself out of bed. | Seriously questioning my life choices. Why Lagos? Why now? Send coffee (and maybe a therapist). | π© | 0 | | | 07:00 AM | Head to the airport | Uber/Taxi | | Praying my Uber driver speaks at least some English. And that he doesn't judge my pajamas. Seriously, they're comfy. | π¬ | 3,500 (ish, depending on traffic, which is going to be a bloodbath) | | | 09:00 AM | Flight Departure | Airpeace (fingers crossed) | My own two legs (for boarding) | Flipping through inflight magazine to avoid the existential dread. Praying the plane doesn't fall out of the sky. | π° | 100,000 (flight ticket, the struggle is real) | | | 10:30 AM | Airport Deboarding | | | Praying airport security is nice. Praying I haven't forgotten my passport. Praying the baggage handlers aren't in a mood. | π | 1000 (airport, transport) | πͺ | | 11:30 AM | Hotel Transfer | | Hotel Shuttle (hopefully!) | Praying the shuttle exists. Praying it's not a rusty, death-trap. Praying I don't get motion sickness. Okay, I'm already anxious. | π¬ | 5000 (Uber) | | | 12:30 PM | Check-in at Oriental | | My suitcase (probably overweight) | Check-in time! Praying the room isn't a closet, I'm hoping for a view, a working AC, and maybe… just maybe… a complimentary bottle of water. Also, praying the receptionist isn't judging my post-flight hair. | π€ | 0 (hopefully included) | | | 01:00 PM | Unpack & Explore | | My own two feet (and a hefty dose of trepidation) | Okay, time to face the music. Unpack, try not to wrinkle my clothes, and scope out the territory. First impressions are EVERYTHING. I am hoping for a good one. I'm gonna stalk the pool. | π€¨ | 0 | | | 02:00 PM | Lunch at the Hotel Restaurant (probably) | | My rumbling stomach | Okay, I'm starving. Time to sample that jollof rice everyone raves about. Hoping it lives up to the hype. Also hoping the waiter understands "vegetarian" without having a full-blown translation crisis. | π€€ | 10,000 (Food, maybe?) | | | 03:30 PM | Pool Time (or attempt to… mostly staring) | | My gloriously pale body (and a swimsuit I haven't worn in ages) | I'm imagining myself lounging by the pool, sipping a cocktail. The reality will probably involve awkward tanning attempts and a fear of drowning. Wish me luck. Will stare at the water. | π♀️ | 2000 (cocktail, if I'm feeling brave) | | | 05:00 PM | Back to Room | | Groggy self. | Shower, maybe nap after the pool. | π΄ | 0 | | | 07:00 PM | Dinner & Drinks at Hotel Bar | | Walking/stumbling (depending on the day) | Hoping there is live music. Hoping the drinks are strong. Seriously, I need a stiff drink after this first day of travel. | πΉ | 15,000 (Drinks and food) | | | 09:00 PM | Crash and burn (sleep, hopefully, I need it) | | Body just wants to die | My brain is screaming, the body is dying. Sleep for good. | π΄π΄π΄ | 0 | |
| Day 2: Lagos Rhapsody? (Maybe Not) | | | | | | | | | 2/12/2024 | 08:00 AM | Wake up | My mortal self. | Praying I can still walk after a long day. And that bed bugs didn't eat me alive. | π | 0 | | | 09:00 AM | Breakfast (Hotel Buffet: Fear and Loathing Edition) | | My hungry self. | Buffet. The land of questionable choices. Praying for edible eggs. And maybe some actual coffee that doesn’t taste like dishwater. Praying I don't eat too much and regret it. | π€’ | 7000 | | | 10:30 AM | Lekki Conservation Centre | Uber | | I’m slightly terrified of heights, but hey, the canopy walkway could be cool… or a complete disaster. Praying I don't get eaten by any monkeys. | π¬ | 10,000 (Entrance, Uber) | | | 01:00 PM | Lunch (somewhere… preferably with air conditioning) | | Uber/Walking (lost) | Time for lunch. Hopefully somewhere with something other than jollof rice. Praying I can find a place that isn't ridiculously expensive. Praying I don’t get ripped off. | π© | 12,000 (Food, more Uber, maybe getting lost fees) | | | 02:30 PM | Lekki Market (bargaining skills on STANDBY) | | Walking, or maybe collapsing | Omg, shopping. Praying prices are reasonable. Praying my bargaining skills are up to snuff. Praying I don’t buy a fake Gucci handbag. | π« | 25,000 (Souvenirs, potential impulse buys… help) | | | 05:30 PM | Return to Hotel (maybe slightly poorer, possibly with a newfound obsession with Nigerian art) | | Uber (hopefully not getting lost) | Let the journey home begin. Praying my bargaining skills were top-notch. | π | 5000 (Uber) | | | 07:00 PM | Pre-Dinner drinks at Pool Bar (again?) | | My own legs (again) | Need a drink after that shopping marathon. Praying for a strong cocktail. Praying I don’t accidentally fall in the pool. | πΉ | 8000 (drinks) | | | 08:30 PM | Dinner at Hotel Restaurant | | My stomach (again) | Let's see if any of the food is edible or not. | π | 13,000 | | | 10:00 PM | Pass out | | Bed | My body wants sleep. | π΄π΄ | 0 | |
| Day 3: The Jollof Rice Reckoning! | | | | | | | | | 2/13/2024 | 08:00 AM | Breakfast (buffet: round 2 - the hunger games) | | | π | 7000 | | | 09:00 AM | Jollof Rice Quest | | On foot, probably. | I'm getting serious about my jollof rice. I'm going on a quest. I'm eating jollof rice at every. single. place. Maybe this is a terrible idea. Praying my stomach can handle the challenge. | π€€π€€π€€ | 15,000 (Jollof Rice, and antacids) | | | 12:00 PM | The Jollof Rice Champion | | Uber | Time to name the champion. Best jollof rice. Pray
Unleash Your Desire: Living Lust 3's Malchow Escape
Okay, spill! Is the Excel Oriental Hotel REALLY as luxurious as it looks in the photos? I’m skeptical.
The reviews say the staff are amazing. True? I’ve had some… *interesting* hotel experiences in Lagos.
Let's talk about the rooms. Are they actually spacious, or just cleverly photographed?
The food! Is it worth the hype? I'm always wary of "hotel food."
Is the pool area as relaxing as it looks? Because Lagos can be… intense.
I'm planning a romantic getaway. Is this hotel appropriate for that?
Any downsides I should be aware of? Nothing is perfect, right?
- As I said, the AC in my room was a bit of a drama queen. Temperamental. Be prepared.
- Traffic getting to the hotel can be a nightmare. Factor in extra travel time.
- The gym is… functional. Not state-of-the-art but has the basics.
- The internet connection can be a bit patchy at times, especially in the rooms.
- Oh, and laundry service? A bit…expensive.
Overall, would you recommend the Excel Oriental Hotel?
